Today I found myself in somewhat of a state of overwhelm spending a minute here, a minute there on a myriad of half-formed tasks/ideas on and potentially on my plate. A friend told me to make a to-do list and eventually I did, or started to... and started checking off as I went as well. Winternship at Woodbine? No, but at least I made the call and cleared one blockage. French drain from the side of the house into the back yard/alley? Started. It is going to be a rather labor intensive project, but this is ok as I am getting half off my rent for it. Now to juggle my time between making these virtual dollars and the actual dollars that will pay the remaining half. I also claimed responsibility for creating the base map for the outside of the GrowHaus, which I am working on in between these very sentences.
The GrowHaus is an indoor farm, marketplace and educational center in Denver's Elyria-Swansea neighborhood. Their (our?) goal is to provide healthy, affordable food for the surrounding community and raise awareness about issues of food justice and sustainability. A small group has been given license to work with the community to develop the north side into something which is both desired by the community and reflects the ethos and goings on inside the GrowHaus. There are some initial ideas which we are collectively choosing not to get too exited about, including community plots, neighborhood compost bins, and permaculture demonstration areas. These of course hinge on community interest, local participation and not least of all: dedication to the point of eventual self-governance. With fall setting in, there is a bit of a chicken-and-egg situation developing.. but the general consensus is to prepare for at least a few hoped-for eventualities on paper and to be ready to start sheet mulching as soon as enough people say "heck yeah we want community plots!"
I have a few computer-based rituals which I have found it rather hard to break out of in the recent past. Check for blog updates on a few of my old stand-by's, see if anything cool is up on Vimeo, FB, email, other email, new anime on tuesdays and thursdays.... repeat. If I'm not pulling anything fresh I might check Craigslist for free stuff or go through the vast list of "see later" bookmarks or if I'm in the mood maybe fire up Cubase or Chainer and plink away at the black-and-whites. Where, then, is that album that could have been done 10 times by now?
At some point in this evening I felt something start to shift as I plunked away the the keys (alphabetical). I started to feel comfortable with this similar, yet slightly more productive computer interaction. Instead of stream-of-consciousness-surfing 10 tabs of loosely-related threads (none related to me, even loosely), I was creating a map for a REAL PROJECT, learning a new software tool that will be crucial later on, occasionally tabbing over to start to solidify a possible plan for next year, and telling you all about it. I feel like I have to multitask, or at least keep multiple tasks open at the same time so that I can always procrastinate more than I don't. The realization is that I am just as comfortable getting something immediately relevant done as I am spinning off into inter-space. The gravity of that realization is, of course, more powerful than I can express to you who have not had to witness the paralysis of overwhelm for so long, and certainly not from this perspective.
Will you look at that? I just came full-circle. Wish me luck... or perhaps focus.
No comments:
Post a Comment